Never Change, Jon Gruden… Never Change

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God bless Jon Gruden, man. For every godawful Monday Night Game we have to sit through this season, we can at least look forward to Jon Gruden doing Jon Gruden things both in and outside of the booth. Smacking a frightened Sean McDonough with pool noodles, talking up every quarterback as the next Montana, and watching card tricks with the awe of six year old at a birthday party…


…while Suzy Kolber looks on like a proud (and also still smoking hot) mother.


The best thing about Jon Gruden becoming the Monday Night Football guy actually has nothing to do with his football acumen. It’s watching him experience all of the non-football things that he’s missed while he was cooped up in a film room for the last 50+ years. Hooters waitresses, fish, magic tricks. This is all new to Jon. Shit, he might not even understand that the pool noodle he’s holding is actually used in pools… like where people swim. To him it’s no different than a push sled or a tackle dummy – just another tool to help players improve at the sports of football. It’s like he’s woken from a fifty year coma and my god is it fun to watch.

The only thing funnier than Gruden’s reaction was watching ESPN Deportes’s finest, John Sutcliffe, sit their in frozen terror for the entire two minute bit. There is a 1000% chance that John Sutcliffe considers these card tricks Sorcery and is dealing with a raging internal debate over whether or not to stab this Magician/Sorcerer with a cross and watching that struggle was absolutely hilarious.


P.S.   Is it me, or does Sean McDonough feel WILDLY uncomfortable in the booth so far? I know it’s early and I know those are big shoes to fill, but something feels off about this whole booth dynamic so far. I mean the play-by-play is fine, McDonough has always been as good as it gets in that respect. But between the pregame stuff and the filler segments and the goofy stuff like this little noodle bit it just kind of feels like someone is pointing a gun at McDonough from behind the camera. Loosen up Seany boy. It’s a long season and Jon Gruden ain’t getting more serious any time soon.

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