I am so sad right now.
I don’t have anything else to describe it. It’s not anger or depression. I don’t feel spite towards anyone or anything. I’m not wallowing in self pity like I thought I would. I don’t even know if I’m actually sad. Maybe “sad” is just a placeholder for the emptiness that is consuming my entire existence right now.
I have plenty of thoughts on this. Thoughts on how it happened. Thoughts on why it happened. Thoughts on what the impact is now and what this means going forward. After two hours of petting my dog and staring blankly through he TV for Thunder-Warriors, I finally snapped into reality to jot down a few notes in my drafts before bed. And I’m gonna try to make sense of everything in a coherent fashion in the Hoops Roundup today.
It’s 8:30am. I just walked my dog in the snow. I’m on my third coffee. And I can feel all those thoughts bursting at the seems to get out.
But right now the vast emptiness inside me is suppressing everything else.
My big beautiful unicorn son tore his ACL. And I am so fucking sad.