You know who’s lost their fastball? The Porn Industry.
Seriously, can someone explain to me how has there not been a protest-themed porn called All Lives Splatter?
How? How does that happen? I mean for the love of christ, guys. What’s even going on over there? What are you guys even doing all day besides cocaine?
I’m pretty sure Who’s Nailin’ Palin? was out before McCain even confirmed her as the nominee. Yet here we are two years into these “_____ Lives Matter” protests and what do we have to show for it? Huh? Where you at Lexington Steele? What’s the word Tommy Gunn? We all immediately made the Lisa Ann-Sarah Palin connection and you’re telling me not one single person in the San Fernando Valley thinks that skinhead Johnny Sins looks like an “All Live Matter” screaming kind of guy?
I know it’s literally your job to sit around with your hand in your pants but stop standing around with your hand in your pants and make this goddamn movie already.
This country is as divided as ever. But if we’ve learned one thing over the last week it’s that from the leftist of liberals the rightest of conservatives, the one thing that unites us as Americans is a love for porn.
Isn’t that right, Ted?