Restaurant Invents “Ketchup Leather”, An Equally Trash Alternative To Ketchup

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Tired of squirting disgusting tomato paste onto you burgers because you’re an entranced sheep following the norms of a time where there were as many water fountains at every corner as there were television channels and having that soggy trash liquify your burger bun? Well folks, have I got a solution for you! Now you can sit there and oven-bake said soggy trash for four hours until it looks like a fruit roll up, cut it into squares, and lay it on your bun like you’re an astronaut eating vacuum sealed meals for the 193rd straight day.

Or… or you could replace the soggy tomato paste with blue cheese, mayo, ranch, any of those three mixed with hot sauce, chipotle mayo, honey mustard, yellow mustard, spicy mustard, teriyaki, teriyaki mixed with hot sauce, just hot sauce, bbq, or any number of the dozens and dozens and dozens of better alternatives to ketchup and especially to this Fruit by the foot lookin ass handbag material.

Puke.


P.S.   Dry tomato paste. It’s dry tomato paste dude.



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