Mike Francesa Does Not Care About Your Softball Injury

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When you’re about to hit Mike with that fire prank call and he’s having absolutely none of it

T’s and P’s to Steve in Port Chester. Not for your elbow. It’s softball. Go sit there in a lawn chair in your sling and drink beers and make fun of your unathletic friends. That’s the only reason 95% of the people actually take part in those leagues. Suck it up dude.

But T’s and P’s for getting absolutely annihilated in front of the largest audience in the tri-state area (BEEN THAT WAY FOR THIRTY PLUS YEAHS). It’s one thing to get shut down by Mike when you’re making a ridiculous point or suggesting a preposterous trade. When you’re trying to argue and get shut down by Mike that’s just par for the course.

But to get all emotional about something and hope to make a heartfelt point and just get absolutely demolished by the Francesa locomotive? Yikes.

Sorry about the arm and all but I think you’ve got some significantly more serious injuries to worry about after that one. My condolences.

While we’re on Mike… anyone who cares even the slightest out the man should go read the interview he did with the ringer this week. It’s just an absolute goldmine of Francesa quotes and takes. Laugh out loud funny stuff from the jump, including him immediately dumping on the medium of podcast by citing the fact that his producers, Mac and Monz, have one.

“Problem is, they’re handing out podcasts like they’re Pez, OK?” Francesa said.

“Right now, my producers have a podcast. No offense, but they have a podcast. If you showed up here as an intern, they’d give you a podcast. … They give everybody a podcast. How can that work? Can you give everybody a show? If you can’t give everybody a show, how can you give everybody a podcast?!”

What interests you about podcasting as a medium? I asked.

“Right now, nothing,” Francesa said. “It’s a folly. They’re doing it so wrong.”

What are they doing wrong?

“I’m not telling you yet because I know how to fix it,” he said.


And even better than that… we learned that Mike’s last show will, most likely, go completely without commercials, updates, or even guests.

Five and a half hours of completely uninterrupted Mike. FIVE AND HALF HOURS. The man is going to sit in that chair, turn on the microphone, guzzle upwards of two dozen Diet Cokes, and talk/take calls for five and half uninterrupted hours. That’s some Socrates shit right there*. Just sitting down and talking to the people for an eternity. Except instead of philosophizing on the meaning of life Mike will probably just end up tearing apart the Mets and predicting the Giants schedule and shutting down a stream of prank calls in between a few vaguely emotional soliloquies about his OVAH THIRTY YEAHS of ratings domination.

And damn if my ear won’t be gorilla glued to the radio for those five an a half hours. Shit, I probably won’t even work. I might just light some candles and throw on a blindfold and listen to the whole show like a Pink Floyd album. The last Mike Francesa Show won’t be a show – it will be an experience. And I for one can’t wait.

*I’m pretty sure those guys like Socrates and Plato and Aristotle did this but to be honest I have no idea. Jesus Christ I’m so stupid. 

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