Good News Guys, Knicks Will Have No Injuries This Year… PHEW!

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PHEW!

Well that’s some good news. Hot damn. Here I was thinking we might be in a little bit of trouble this year, what with a start forward dealing with chronic knee pain from 2015 surgery… and a starting center coming off a separated shoulder who’s played over 67 games just once since 2009 due to a litany of injuries… and a backup point guard who ruptured his achilles a year and a half ago… oh and Derrick Rose.

You know, the most injury-prone (former) superstar of the last decade. The guy who’s had about a dozen surgeries. The guy who lets his fuckass idiot brother determine when he will or won’t play and ruined all trust between himself and his former organization. The guy whose gang rape trial the franchise is just casually ignoring right now. The guy who will get karmically injured the second things start going well this season. This guy…

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But hey… Jeff said no injuries. That’s good enough for me. Jeff went up to Mount Sinai hospital and spoke to God and God decreed that this just and righteous organization… an organization that currently employees a sexual harasser to run the women’s basketball team and a man on (civil) trial for gang rape to play point guard… will skate through the season scot-free. No injuries from here until we’re holding the Larry O’Brien in June.

Phew. What a relief.

Thanks, Jeff.


Fuck I hate this team


P.P.S.   I would feel a lot worse about this statement, which might be the most ridiculous thing I’ve ever heard, if we didn’t just learn from John Brenkus that Kristaps is the most perfect human specimen to ever grace a basketball court. Guys Gods like Kristaps don’t get hurt, right? RIGHT?

*knocks on all of the wood*

 



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