Je Suis Diesel The Self-Aware Basset Hound

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We’re not all cut out to be best in show… Diesel is just the only one self-aware enough to get that


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Je Suis Diesel. And Diesel Je Suis all of us. And if anyone could help me out and let me know if I used Je Suis properly there that would be much appreciated.

Look, we’re not all cut out to be best in show. Not everyone can be the top dog. Some of us just need to keep a steady pace and make it through the obstacles of life without fucking up. Are you gonna win the race that way? Probably not. But I’ll tell you what… you’re gonna finish. Slowly but surely, you are going to finish. The dog with the self awareness to know his limitations like Diesel here is a dog that’s gonna end his life a happy guy.

Will he end it with fame? With glory? With riches? No. But he’ll still end it with a belly full of treats and a smile of his face. Because when you think about it, what does all that extra effort earn you anyway? A bigger house with more space to fit your ego? A line of friends and family asking for handouts? And herpes from that girl you forgot to wrap it up for after your wife took half the money and ran? Mo money mo problems, right?

Well that’s not something you’re ever gonna hear from the mouth of Diesel, the self-aware basset hound who retired with a solid nest egg and an upcoming trip to Europe and a few nice hobbies to enjoy during all that newfound free time. So when the dog who raced through these ropes at a blistering speed is hocking old dog toys on the corner to pay of the mortgage on his mansion ten years from now, just remember that old Diesel here will be happily working on a new doghouse for his grandkids in his self-made woodworking shop in the garage.

Slow and steady wins the race, Diesel. I think Shakespeare said that.


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