KASICH! Hit That One From The Parking Lot

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While I respect Bernie’s old man midrange game, everyone (except Phil Jackson) knows that pace and space wins in 2016. I need a President who can spread the floor and hit shots with a hand in his face. And Kasich looks like Klay Thompson out there.


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OHHHHH! MY GOODNESS!

KASICH! HIT THAT ONE FROM THE PARKING LOT!

March Madness baby… it is fucking LIT.


Look, I said it when Bernie got those buckets and I’ll said it again… I need a President with some athleticism. It’s an absolute must. Any President that can’t knock down an 18-footer or at the very least throw a baseball in no President of mine. Trump is probably the kid who shoots a push shot over the backboard

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Hillary likely looks as comfortable with the ball as she does dabbing around millennials.

hillarydab

And Ted Cruz would make some horrible joke about the Princeton offense before stabbing the basketball and sending a series of taunting letters filled with cryptograms to the San Francisco Chronicle.

You know… because he’s the Zodiac Killer

cruzzodiac2.jpg

That means this election is gonna come down to Bernie vs. Kasich. And while I respect Bernie’s old man midrange game, everyone (except Phil Jackson) knows that pace and space wins in 2016. Bernie might have a nice, efficient windex game, but Kasich looks like Klay Thompson out there with that high release. Spreading the floor, opening up driving lanes for his teammates, hitting shots with a hand in his face. That’s what I’m getting from Kasich. Sure Bernie might try to wear Kasich down in the post with some old playground post game. But unless he’s Kevin McHale down there he’s gonna run out of ideas. Meanwhile, Kasich will run Bernie off so many screens his he will be spinning. This isn’t even a contest. Kasich 21-13. Water Break. We’ll run it back in five.


P.S.


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