Phil Jackson Wants To Coach The Knicks… But Only For Home Games

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Rather than just hiring the best coach available in Thibs, this geriatric fuck is going to limp down to his coaching high chair 41 times a year and keep Kurt “20% career winning percentage” Rambis on board as his road game Triangle Proxy for the other 41. Goddammit I hate this team.


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ESPN  —  There’s even talk Jackson could offer to coach home games next season, with Rambis coaching the road games. It’s an offer the late Lakers owner Jerry Buss once flatly rejected, but it could be an interesting compromise to hiring Rambis as the head coach next season.

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It’s getting harder and harder not to hate Phil Jackson’s guts, man. With each passing day the needle moves a little farther away from “basketball genius” and a little closer to “senile narcissist”. Every single thing Phil has said or done over these two years is the move of a guy more set on proving that his system is the “right way” to play basketball rather than investing in the long term success of the franchise. It started with keeping Melo around on a team that was clearly rebuilding, and it’s culminated with the insane notion that Kurt Rambis–who in two and a half seasons between Minnesota and NY has a coaching record of 37-141–is the leading candidate for the job next season. All because Phil is so self-absorbed and so stubborn that he won’t go outside of his “coaching tree” to find a real coach who might run something other than the vaunted Triangle Offense.

And now this… the absolutely preposterous notion of this big lumbering fuck coming down to grace this team with his coaching presence… but only half the time.

Rather than just hire Tom Thibodeau… who happens to be one of the five best basketball coaches in the world… who will immediately turn NY into a top five defense even with #StayMe7oOnDefense on the court… who has been shown to run more elements of “the triangle” in his system than most coaches… who’s dream job is to coach the New York Knicks…

Rather than that, this geriatric fuck is gonna limp his way to his high chair 41 times a year to impart this mystical basketball wisdom that has only proven itself to work when run by the GOAT or by two of the three best players in the league at the time. Oh and those other 41 games? Yeah, they’ll be run by this incompetent proxy with an Anime fetish and a 20% career winning percentage.

But hey… don’t worry, guys… Phil has taught Kurt the ways of the Triangle. He is enlightened not just a basketball sense, but also a lifestyle sense. It hasn’t worked yet for Kurt, but I’m sure it will work next season as he switches back and forth between assistant and head coach four times a week. Half the pressure of coaching means double the performance… everyone knows that. I’m sure this will work out well.

Fuck this team.



P.S.   I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again:

The best thing that can happen to this Knicks franchise is Phil Jackson going back to LA to run the Lakers for Jeanie. It just makes logical sense for both sides.

For Phil… LA will (probably) have a top five pick, a ton of cap room, no Kobe to bog them down, the allure of playing in LA, a better chance at KD or Russ over the next two summers, and the 99% chance of hiring Luke Walton (who would never leave the west coast to come to NY). There’s more hope of short-term relevancy there.

And for the Knicks… as little as I trust Dolan to make the right hire, almost anyone he brings in will know to hire Thibs right away. Phil is the only asshole stubborn enough not to bring in someone outside his “coaching tree”. And I’ll gladly take 5 years of Thibs and a bad GM over stubborn Phil and an incompetent head coach.


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