Dabo Swinney Murdered ND Alum (And Supposed CBS Analyst) Aaron Taylor For Using The Word “Lugubrious”

Follow @yourboyham11 on Twitter and Like What’s The Action on Facebook

“I don’t know who Aaron Taylor is, but I guess he is analyst or commentator,” Swinney said. “The comment was we were not going to be ready. Clemson wouldn’t be ready, and our crowd was going to be lugubrious when the game was over. I don’t know how to spell that. I’m hooked on phonics. I just sound it out. Lugubrious. But I did look it up and lugubrious means to look sad and disappointed. So I want to wish Notre Dame and their lugubrious crowd safe travels back to South Bend. And we will show up in 2020. We look forward to that trip. So I appreciate the education that we got this week – the vocab lesson. The first thing our players said to me when they came to the locker room was ‘man that leprechaun was a little lugubrious looking’.”

“Hey Aaron Taylor, first of all I don’t even know who the fuck you are. Second of all, you throwing too many big words at me, now because I don’t understand em, Imma take em as disrespect. Watch ya mouth.”

Dabo out here just murdering Notre Dame alums in cold blood. As soon as someone is able to find the channel Aaron Taylor lives on, can you check him for a pulse? That is, of course, assuming that you can figure out which one Aaron Taylor is. It might be tough to differentiate him from the other dead-eyed talking heads buried on CBS Sports 9 lacking the charisma to go on a real network and regurgitate hot takes . I guess you can just look for the guy at a small desk in the shared cubicle with that stupid leprechaun flag and a dictionary laid out like White Goodman, pleasuring himself to the General Studies degree on his wall.

If you can find him, send word that Dabo and the rest of the Tigers feel a little lugubrious today. I’m sure they are a little sad and disappointed to know they’re being charged with homicide of the entire Notre Dame program. Good thing the trial isn’t until January 12th. We have some things to take care of before that.