Meet Slim Jesus, A White Rapper Who Looks Like A 12-Year-Old Eminem and Also Sucks At Rapping

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(pussy)

I really want to make fun of Slim Jesus and his fake jewelry, but I’m afraid he might get too high on Oregano and shoot me with that spray-painted nerf gun. Not trying to have that kind of drama in my life. Just going to wish Slim Jesus the best of luck as he starts sixth grade tomorrow. Hopefully puberty hits soon for him. Getting bullied for those noodle arms is going to suck.

P.S. I am curious how he became the rapper of this crew. Because that song fucking sucked. I mean how much do his black friends suck at rapping? They must be absolutely awful, right? That’s the only reason they could possibly allow the Uncharismatic Eminem be the star here.

P.P.S. When all of your black friends are dancing and you don’t know if you’re allowed to.